The Voice UK’s new judge Gavin Rossdale opens up about his ‘worst days’ following his split from Gwen Stefani and the pressure he’s under from his kids to find love again

LESS than five minutes into our chat, Gavin Rossdale is proudly showing off pictures of his children.

“I have to show you these,” he beams.

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After a difficult 18 months, Gavin Rossdale can see the light at the end of the tunnelCredit: Fabulous

“The best thing about my children is that they’re really cool, interesting, sweet and kind.”

It’s not what we were expecting at all from the notoriously private rock star, who is perhaps most famous for his marriage to – and subsequent split from – No Doubt singer and all-out style queen Gwen Stefani, 47.

The pair, who have three children together, Kingston James McGregor, 10, eight-year-old Zuma Nesta Rock and Apollo Bowie Flynn, nearly three, shocked the showbiz world when they split in August 2015 after 20 years together.

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Gavin and Gwen Stefani’s divorce after 20 years together shook the showbiz worldCredit: WENN

Gwen filed for divorce on the grounds of “irreconcilable differences” amid allegations Gavin had a three-year affair with the couple’s nanny.

It’s understandably been a difficult period of adjustment, and one that Gavin has not spoken candidly about before now.

“[Divorce] was completely opposite to what I wanted. Really not…” he sighs and stares at the floor.

“But here we are.

“Apart from death, I think divorce is one of the hardest, most painful things to go through.”

One thing that has kept his spirits up is landing a coveted judging role on ITV’s The Voice UK alongside Sir Tom Jones, Will.i.am and Jennifer Hudson.

Another is undoubtedly his children.

You get the feeling they’ve helped the 51 year old – who is also father to model Daisy Lowe, 27, after an affair in the late 1980s with her mum Pearl, who was married at the time – see the light at the end of the tunnel.

“The one thing – the only good thing, because everything else is not good – is we care about the children and it’s about them. So we do everything to make this life change as seamless as possible.”

Gavin landed a job as a coach on ITV’s The Voice this yearCredit: ITV

Gavin and Gwen met in 1995 when No Doubt were on tour supporting Gavin’s alternative rock band Bush – famous for their Billboard No.1 album Razorblade Suitcase.

They married in September 2002 at St Paul’s Church in Covent Garden, London, where Gwen wore a custom-made white and pink ombré Christian Dior dress designed by her friend John Galliano.

Two weeks later, they had a second wedding in LA, attended by A-list pals including Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston and Ben Stiller.

So 18 months after the breakdown of their 13-year marriage, is Gavin ready to date again?

“I’ve so much going on, that’s not a factor right now,” he says, shaking his head.

The same cannot be said of Gwen, who has moved on with American country singer Blake Shelton – her co-judge on The Voice in the US.

Their romance is constantly at the centre of engagement and pregnancy rumours.

Gavin says Gwen’s happiness has meant he is under pressure from his sons to find love himself.

“They want me to get a girlfriend and examine me if a name pops up on a text,” he laughs.

“I think Kingston is going to be in the CID when he grows up.

“They obviously see a complete set-up with their other home, and it’s really busy [with] all the family.

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Gavin reveals the children from his marriage to Gwen, Kingston James McGregor, 10, Zuma Nesta Rock, eight, and Apollo Bowie Flynn, nearly three, want him to get a new girlfriendCredit: Fabulous

“When they come to me – unlucky, it’s just me! I always feel a bit like: ‘Sorry about that.’ So we have a lot of play dates and the [other] parents come round and have big dinners.

“Zuma is really into dressing up and we have a lot of capes, which he wears all the time. To him, it’s Halloween his [whole] life. I really try and make every day festive and fun for them.”

When they were together, the couple kept their relationship out of the spotlight as much as possible and – unlike some other celebrity couples – they are trying to do the same with their divorce for the sake of the boys.

“It was shocking for everyone. For me, it was about being solid for them, and silent but respectful of Gwen. That’s what I’ll be forever. Those days were the worst days ever. It’s all a bit of a blur.

“You have to try and be as compassionate as possible. It was weird because I had to go and make a home from scratch that could compare to the great one they already have.

“That was the challenge for me as a dad.”

The couple share joint access of the children, with Gwen remaining in LA, and Gavin moving to nearby Studio City.

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Gavin and Gwen were married for 13 years and split amid rumours Gavin was having an affair with their nanny, Mindy MannCredit: Getty Images

Now back on his home turf for a stint on The Voice UK, Gavin plans to fly back and forth, depending on work commitments.

It’s clear that he’s determined to make sure his boys come through the split as unaffected as they possibly can be. And it’s not hard to understand why.

Gavin’s own parents – Douglas, a doctor, and Barbara – divorced when he was 11 years old.

He and his sisters Lorraine and Soraya were raised by their dad, while their mum remarried and moved to Florida.

“The one thing I took from that was that kids spell love as T-I-M-E.

“They’re a bit feral around me and like jumping off the balcony on to the big white sofa, flying around with Nerf guns and having pillow fights.

“My favourite thing is when they go round to other people’s houses and I’m told they’re so polite with their pleases and thank yous.

“They are like new and improved versions of me. When a grown man pours them water [at a restaurant], I’m really insistent they look into his eyes and say thank you. I don’t want them to take it for granted.”

Despite his years in LA, Gavin wants his sons to grow up appreciating their British heritage.

“I’m very proud of being British, so found it really easy to maintain who I am,” he says.

“We were always going to have our kids in England, but as soon as a girl gets pregnant every decision is hers. She wanted to be in America with her doctors and her mum. That’s the only reason really [we lived in America].

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Gavin and Gwen had three children together and are based in the States – but he’s happy to be back on home turf for his stint on The Voice UKCredit: Splash

“[My children] have such a different life [compared to me growing up]. With their mum they live behind two gates.”

When Gavin got his role on The Voice UK, Gwen immediately congratulated him.

“What’s weird is that for the last year and nine months, I have always adapted to The Voice in the US and submitted [my] schedule [to Gwen].

“So the irony of all ironies is that she wrote to me and said: ‘Congratulations on getting The Voice, you must be so excited,’ and
I said: ‘Thank you so much. I’m mainly stressed about the schedule with the boys. Thank you in advance for [your] rough schedule’.

“The tables have turned a bit. You have to be really adaptable and helpful to co-parent.”

It’s hard not to feel for Gavin. He’s softly spoken, charming and comes across as endearingly vulnerable.

But there are many who would lay the blame for the split from Gwen squarely at his feet.

Rumours have abounded that he had an affair with the couple’s full-time nanny, 20-something Mindy Mann, which carried on even while Gwen was pregnant with Apollo.

If the rumours are true, then it certainly appears that Gavin – who no longer employs a nanny – is remorseful.

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Gavin is open about his regrets and says it’s ‘human’ to sometimes wish you had done things differentlyCredit: Fabulous

So with the power of hindsight, does he wish he’d behaved differently?

“I mean, obviously. I know we all wish that, but we can’t, so I have to deal with reality. You can’t not have regrets and be human at the same time.

“There are lots of scenarios [I’d like to change]. I’d like to have had 10 No.1s in England, but unfortunately I can’t rewrite my career.

“We had 20 years together and that in itself is pretty incredible. It’s a lifetime. I still think she’s incredible. It was a lovely 20 years and we have three amazing children. There were a lot of positives, and with time they’ll become more and more obvious.”

Someone who has been there every difficult step of the way has been Gavin’s eldest child Daisy.

“The unconditional love she shows me is so powerful,” he smiles.

“It’s one of the greatest gifts and I’m grateful for her every day.

“Her support has been incredible through all of this. She’s so perceptive and smart and knew I was vulnerable.”

It’s a remarkable place for the father and daughter to be in, considering their troubled history.

Daisy was just 15 years old when she realised that she didn’t share a blood type with either her mum or her mum’s ex husband Bronner Handwerger, who she believed to be her father.

Pearl confessed she suspected that Gavin, who was Daisy’s godfather, might actually be her dad.

This led to a DNA test, and although Gavin initially refused to cooperate, it was later proved that he was Daisy’s biological father. Gavin has since cut ties with Daisy’s mum Pearl.

“Daisy and I have worked hard on [our relationship]. I try and be the best I can for her and keep in constant contact.

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Despite a turbulent start to their relationship, Gavin and his daughter Daisy Lowe are close now and he credits her for helping him get through a tough timeCredit: Instagram

“I often think that it could have gone the other way, and she could have been a very difficult person.”

But one relationship Gavin is not up for discussing is his affair with cross-dressing singer Marilyn, 54, back in the 1980s.

Former mutual pal Boy George revealed the relationship in his 1995 memoir Take It Like A Man. Gavin responded by insisting they were “just friends”, until he admitted to the affair in a 2010 interview and described it as “experimentation.”

Today, Gavin’s eyes open wide when asked about it and he scrambles to find the words to respond.

“I don’t know anything about that. I don’t… I was 17. I don’t even know, it’s like, like 30 years ago, I have no idea… It was so confusing to me… like, I just don’t get it.”

We quickly move on to easier subjects.

Mainly his new gig on The Voice UK – which launched earlier this month on ITV after the channel paid £355million to poach it from the BBC – and which has seen him form a bromance with Tom Jones, 76.

“I’ve bonded with Tom so much. It feels very paternal, and he respects the fact that I’m a professional,” Gavin says.

“I’m really competitive and like a challenge. I have [found] a superstar and five other people who are all really close.”

However, he confesses that before joining the show he didn’t know too much about it.

“I used to watch the bits of Gwen [on the US version] and then fast-forward,” he admits.

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Gavin says he and co-judge Tom Jones have developed a real ‘bromance’Credit: Fabulous

“I helped mentor Gwen’s team [in 2014] and didn’t realise how emotionally invested you get with the contestants. That’s what made my decision, along with the obvious exposure and opportunities that would come with it.

“I’m grateful for my rebirth and, for most people, my introduction. I’m a realist and know that I’ve been reduced to three sentences: being in America, ex husband of Gwen and seen with his kids a lot.”

Gavin is doing himself a bit of a disservice.

After leaving Westminster School aged 17, he created his first band Midnight before going on to form Bush.

While the rock band only achieved marginal success in the UK, it was a different story in the US.

Their debut album Sixteen Stone was certified as six times multi-platinum and they went on to sell 20 million records.

“I achieved the level of success in England that [equalled] bands I was inspired by, including the Pixies and The Smiths, such as playing five nights at Brixton Academy.

“I never liked how my success elsewhere was shoved down everybody’s throats.”

After a difficult 18 months, things are certainly looking up for Gavin.

There’s a new Bush album in the pipeline, as well as his clothing line Sea of Sound, a deal with Jay Z’s Roc Nation label to write for other artists, and discussions to host a cookery show.

Earlier behind the scenes of our shoot, a topless (and very ripped) Gavin had teased: “Make me look good – I’m single!”

Somehow, we don’t think he’ll be lonesome for much longer.
Watch Gavin on The Voice UK, Saturdays, ITV.